Dreamt about our beloved Swami but I feel lost now


2

The day I saw the initiation form open up again, I was overwhelmed. I took 4 hours to fill that tiny form , reading, re-reading it again and again before I hit submit. I was hopeful but cautious in letting joy engulf me completely. I have waited for this for 2 years or more I think. My husband who is travelling on business warned me to not be disappointed if in case... you know. I said of course, I was all hunky dory. I started my first Sadhna, I rejoined Black Lotus, took up Navratri Sadhna too and I dreamt of Him day before yesterday. I saw Swami asking me for a cup of tea - with Khadi chummach cheeni (it means a lot of sugar) & then when I asked him with my eyes if I was in. He nudged his head slowly which meant - no. I was shaken as I remember.
I woke up all groggy. Not sad, but thoughtful yes. That was day before. But I realised after 48 hours that I am doing terrible. I am again falling into the bouts of depression I have been through previously, I have lost any inclination whatsoever I had for my Nav Durga Sadhnas. I am continuing though with all my might and end up feeling guilty because what is a Sadhna without devotion. I have no clue why I find it hard to even get up every morning. I am lost & lazy & sad. No question there. 

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If it's a yes, then Swami has best in store for you. And if it's a no, then again Swami has best in store for you. Not all who achieved their spiritual goals have been initiated. Don't worry at all, whatever it will be, Swati ji, it will be a thoughtfully and mindfully decided by Swamiji. Sri Ramakrishna had many monks around him who who were initiated into sanyasa. There was one, Mahendranath Gupta who too wanted the same, but Ramakrishna kept him as a householder bhakta. He then went on to write Kathamrita, the Gospel of Sri Ramakrishna. 😇 So, you see, Swami keeps people where they ought to be. No worries at all. 😇 Sri Matre Namah! 😇🙇‍♀️❣ Jai Maa!

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Dear Swati, 

I know it is such a stressful wait. I would say:

1. Stay positive. The dream could just have been your fear coming to the surface or meant something which you cannot understand yet.

2. Keep doing your thing

3. I think, so far, in most cases, Swami doesn’t actually refuse as such, He asks for more time. If you have sought His refuge, don’t worry. I bet He loves you unconditionally.

4. Cheer up, you are on os.me, everything will be for the best💖

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Swati ji, even if your initiation request doesn't get accepted, please don't feel disheartened or sad. The response regarding your initiation form is not a measure of your love for Swami ji or His love for you. The initiation form is for seekers who seek something more than this mundane world and need His guidance to tread that path. If you seek His love, you don't even need to fill a form or do anything, if have made a place for Him in your heart, He'll know. You can just meet Him at the ashram and take His blessings. 

Anyway, I hope your initiation request gets through! Much love ❤️ 

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Jai Sri Hari, Swati Ji! 

The dream could be the mind playing it's tricks. Maybe because you were thinking/worrying about this particular thing so much that it also took shape of a dream (monkey mind 101).

Also, I feel Swamiji comes into dreams to bless/to guide/or for something positive only. I THINK he would never come into HIS children's dream to say no for this, when already there is a date assigned for the results of the initiation requests. Swati ji, I could be wrong here and really I do not wish to deny your experience, pls pardon me if it feels so. I am no one to deny what you experienced, these are just my thoughts. 🙂 

I know it must be so hard, but still if you can tell your mind to wait for just a few more days. Like a friend talks to another to just wait for some more time. It's your first sadhana and you are doing your best, Maa sees that. That is the only thing that matters to the divine. It'll get even better with time and HIS grace. 

I am writing this comment because I can feel you, I have been there. I can understand how hard it must be for you. HE knows your love for him. HE knows everything that you are facing and HE is with you for sure. So trust HIM, it's going to be OKAY. 

Sending lots of love and strength to you and your little one. 🙂 

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Om Sri Hari Beautiful Swati ji,

Your note made me emotional; I could feel your pain.

Here is good news for you:

If you genuinely believe that beloved Guruji came to say hello to you, then bliss is all around. He also does the same as we all test and retest before our complete surrender towards our Guru as disciples. Once you surrender and accept a Guru, there is going back, no if's or but's or any others questions. So please make sure that is what you want.

If I were you, I would take this as a challenge, a test. Is my devotion complete and pure even if He doesn't accept me as his disciple right now? I will keep trying my best, follow his teachings (kindness, compassion, gratefulness), love him unconditionally, and continue my sadhana and meditation. I know he is watching our progress at every step, and Divine never lets anyone down. 

Girl, cheer up! It's your time now. Good luck with your sadhana and test. I know you will do awesome. 

Sending all my love, peace, and respect. 🙏💗

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1

Dear Swati G,

You must wait while the sugar is still dissolving...

If you want to dissolve faster, just stir!

I hope you get the metaphor, teehee!

 

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https://os.me/do-dreams-mean-anything/Tha t's Swami ji 

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Swatiji, your voice in your uploaded songs is so full of devotion and surrender, that it gives me goosebumps. I have repeatedly heard these.

I can feel that pain and struggle within, like you. I have also filled the initiation form. I shall pray for you during Sadhana today. You also, please pray for me. 

Meeraji, i have not met Swamiji in person. Which means i will not be in. Only thing that i can do is pray to Ma. Please, let me in Ma.....

 

 

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Swati, sending you a warm warm hug. You are so beautiful and brilliant. And see, you have a lovely hubby by your side. Don't take any thought of your too seriously, and if I may, don't take any dream too seriously too. You are doing great and you shall come out of this too. Sending you lots of love and prayers:)

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Swati have u seen Swamiji physicaly once? Because that's the pre requisit

 

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