When does self-love become selfishness? What is the difference between the two?


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When does self-love become selfishness? What is the difference between the two?

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A very beautiful question!  In my opinion, a key factor that can affect the balance between self love and selfishness is self reflection. Without the ability to reflect within, self love can quickly transform into selfishness. With regular introspection and reflection on life and ones place in the cosmos, there arises within a true and heartfelt appreciation for ones own self and importantly a deep sense of self respect. With true self appreciation and self respect also arises quite naturally a sense of empathy and compassion towards others. This is what I have understood as Self Love. On the other side of the spectrum, Selfishness arises when your sense of self worth and appreciation towards yourself gets diminished. When you feel diminished, you start to become more self absorbed, defensive and cut off from others. When you feel cut off, you experience a lack of empathy and care for others and their feelings. When a person leads a lifestyle such that there is a great deal of stress and very little time for reflection or introspection, selfish tendencies are more prevalent. I hope this is helpful 🙂

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When u r concerned for your own care it's self love but if you are concerned only for self care even being indifferent to emotions and needs of others it's selfishness.

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If Self love doesn’t make us love others, it is more of a self obsession. 
Self love is the absolute beginning of Universal love:)

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We all know the difference deep within, but we have hidden the "atma ki awaz" over many lifetimes of vasnas. If you can look yourself in the eye and say your action is absolutely justified, I guess you are probably right. 

 

self-love as you mention = Self love, i.e., love of your higher self and not of this body, material things, and material gains. If an action takes you closer to God, it is most likely born out of self-love. If it takes you away from your spiritual growth, it is likely selfishness.

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If a plane is in trouble and masks need to be worn:

Selfishness: Let me put my mask on, and get myself ready to come out alive. I don’t care if anyone else survives. It’s all about me, myself and I.

 

Self-Love: Let me wear my mask, only then can I help as many people as possible and we can all be safe.

So basically what Meera said!:)

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I think self-love without inclusiveness is dangerous. The whole point of self-love, I think is not to just love yourself, your mind or your body, its to discover that you're the source of love. When you discover the source of love in you, naturally everybody, from animals to human beings start feeling like you.

In other words, there's oneness. Self-love promotes oneness which effectively translates to "love yourself so you can love the creation."

Its about reflection here. How happy, miserable, loving or hateful you are will be reflect in the world. I think I heard somewhere, "It's not the universe that is good or bad, its your state of mind."

Once you develop love within you, everything starts feeling pleasant. This is my humble understanding of self-love.

It becomes selfishness when its only one aspect that is "love yourself" and not the other. 

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