Well for few days i have been thinking of ways to take out more time to deepen my meditation practice and pursue some kind of sadhna, but somehow things are not falling in place and i am being frustrated.
Few incidents that happened with me day before yesterday.
In the morning i was feeling sad for not devoting much time for meditation. A disciple of swami ji, who lives in different time zone and we are not regular chatter, sent me a WhatsApp message.
Almost after a month of our last communication he sends me this
“”You cannot change others but you can change yourself. If you become light, darkness cannot exist around you. The best way is to give an outstanding performance in everything you do. For the next forty days, make a resolution that you will not highlight anyone’s shortcomings and Nature will reciprocate. Try it to believe it!”
– Om Swami”
Now here was an indication for a sadhna. I asked him why did you sent me this message, he replied i don’t know.
So i took it as a guide for what i have to do for another forty days. So if i am being over generous in commenting and complimenting you guys in futute, you know very well where it is coming from.😆
It was 11 pm. I was dead tired and didn’t even read my book and went to bed. I discussed with my husband my frustration of not being able to follow any sadha and not devoting any time for meditation..he said you are overthinking. You are just doing fine. Focus on your duties and that’s sufficient.
Now blame it on moon, as full moon affects me sometimes, i became upset with his reply and like two mature people we didn’t argue further but disagreed and decided to sleep.
I felt like reading to divert my mind. And i am reading Om by Swami Rama these days, which talks about Mandukya Upanishad. The para that i got to read after two lines was this-
“Every home is a temple..Life of a householder is a sadhna. Many a times you cannot do what you want to because you will have to see the wants of your husband, children, neighbor, country. Many a times you may have to sacrifice your own little wants no matter how important.
We have to do this sadhna there is no other way….there should not be any frustration.”
Now damn, after a not so happy talk with husband i got a guidance by Swami Rama exactly in the same direction in which i disagreed with him
I felt guilty of kind of not respecting my husband’s views but ego didn’t allow to succumb and i decided i will be normal, loving and polite next morning.
Now at 11 .23pm the same disciple sent another message and it was a long one but the gist was this-
“In taking it upon ourselves to teach someone a lesson, we ignore, at the cost of our peace, the immense scale at which the universe operates. May I suggest that if the fabric of revenge has swaddled your heart, you may as well stop praying and meditating. For, such spiritual acts have no effect on a mind smothered by vengeance. You have to let go. We are ever-transforming, ever-changing, all one has to do to reach the pinnacle of self-realization is to take every step towards positive transformation, towards goodness. You will not regret it. Pure love is not just the reward but the journey as well.
Love is part of your very existence. If you want to experience bliss without treading an arduous path of tedious practices, just start giving out pure love. For every emotion you are offered, return it with pure love; for each gesture you are shown, gesticulate back yours of love, for every word uttered to you, articulate yours with love. Try this unfailingly for a few months and see the difference for yourself.
If you are tired of being human, become god instead. Be divine.”
Now i was shocked..i said thanks to him and said i much needed this and today you have become the medium to guide me.
Next day i started with positive approach, no dragging of last night’s disagreement and i found my husband was more loving and affectionate.
Now what i realised that i was trying to control situations and wanted to run ahead of time but nature has a time and plan for everything.
As a householder i am already doing a sadhna, a tough one, just that i need to work a bit more on self transformation within that framework.
I am glad that i was guided in these ways and i feel much peaceful while performing my duties since morning, hope it’s not temporary. 😄
PS: i am so much grateful to all those who contributed by supporting the author tab for me. I can’t express in words how i feel. I don’t know what good karma did i do to deserve all this unconditional love and support from lovely people like you all.
Special thanks to Vamsi, Aditya Shahi ji and Vinayak Sangal ji and all the anonymous souls for being so generous. This women is inspired by your good karma and will try to pass on the benefit to needy people. Thanks alot.