Message to my Son

My Dear Son,
I am your father, but not of your choice. Call it Karma. There is not much time left, and I thought I better write these things now before it is too late.
I must tell you about life, or rather my experiences, which may or may not happen to you, but at least you will know about it. Remember, although your heart is on the left, it will always be Right. Trust your inner feelings.

Friends:
The best friends are those you grew up in childhood or your classmates. They are the only ones who know you and understand you. This bond is binding, and even if you have not met after several years, the friendship remains strong. If you want to know your true friend, try borrowing money from him. If he lends you without conditions, then he is a friend indeed. Otherwise, if he gives you all kinds of excuses and cannot lend you some money, you know where your friendship stands. But please, if your friend is poor, do not expect him to have money. But please keep your promise to pay him what you owe. If you want to lose a friend, lend him some money. If he does not return it, never mind let it go, as how much you gave him is what he is worth. So, do not lend him by the thousands. Only loan what you can afford to lose; otherwise, it will be painful, as you will feel cheated. A friend in need is a friend indeed. In all your life, you will only have a handful of friends. The others are colleagues or acquaintances. They are not close friends.

Gambling:
Do not gamble in cards, horses or casinos. It is all about your greed. I have bought the Lottery for 40 years but only had a stroke of luck once. I spent more on buying the Lottery. You will always have hope, and if you do not strike, you will feel despair. Thus, you made your despair. If you have an itch to go to the Casino, remember to run away fast when you win. Remember, you can only lose back what you won, but you can never win back what you lose. So either way, win or lose, learn to RUN when you are ahead and Run when you are losing… cut your losses as there will be another day. But you can ruin your life if you get hooked on gambling.

People you meet
You will meet all kinds of people throughout your life. Some good, some bad, and some will use you or abuse you.  Take it in your stride? They come to your Life to teach you a lesson. So move on and forget the hurt, but not the lesson. As for the people who are kind to you, treasure them. Everyone does everything for a reason. But be grateful to those that have helped you, as it will show your character. When someone is kind to you, it doesn’t mean they like you. You must learn to see through them and always trust your instincts. Remember that nothing belongs to you when you lose the people or things you love and treasure the most. You are the custodian for a while and do not regret it for too long. Learn to let it go.

Time
Time flies, so make the best use of your time. Remember, you can waste Time, spend Time, but you can never buy or borrow Time. So the earlier you treasure your time, the better. You cannot be happy all the time. There are always up and downs, and believe me, Time is a healer. Spend more Time introspecting rather than retrospecting. Hindsight is always 20/20. Looking back and regretting does not change the past.

Love
True love is the best thing that can happen to you. Love and lust are not the same, as the latter will not last. Find your true love, but sometimes this love is one-sided, meaning you love her, but she does not love you. It is painful. Better to move as if love is unrequited. You end up being miserable.

Similarly, you could be the one that is loved, and you don’t love her. Don’t feign or fake love. The greatest thing you can have in this life is loving someone and being beloved by that person. But do not have any illusion of love as only you can feel true love it can bring you. If your “True Love” left you, be patient and let Time heal your wounds, and if they return, do not let your pride or ego come in the way. Remember, sometimes you will only know true love when you have lost it. If you are looking to settle down, please make sure you are compatible, too, as love can wither away over Time if you quarrel all the time. Give and take in a relationship. Above all, be honest in your relationship.

Knowledge
The knowledge you have gained is never lost and will come in handy one day. Do read books that interest you as it exercises your brains. Use your knowledge wisely. Remember, nobody can steal the knowledge from you, so share it only with those you care about. Wisdom will come from your experience and not from the inside.

On Aging
I don’t expect you to support me, but it will be your call. I cannot assist you forever. Learn to stand on your own feet, but if you need help, I will always be there. Learn to grow up to be independent; that way, you do not owe anybody anything, not even me.
From that point, you are your own. Be responsible for your decisions. Be humble as whether you have a Rolex or a cheap watch; it will still tell the same Time. Whether you take the bus or drive a Benz, the destination is the same. Your health is your hidden wealth. Take care of your body, and it will take care of you. Do not abuse your body with junk food., drugs, smoking and alcohol. Remember, anything done in moderation is the key to survival. Medical bills can wipe out your savings. You are required to be accountable for others, but don’t expect accountability from others to you. Be kind to others, but don’t expect the same from others to you. Remember, if you decide to treat others well, they do not necessarily do the same in return. You must be very clear on this, or you’ll be very disappointed and harbour hate. Hate and anger block your happiness, so learn to let go. Giving without expectation is the safest and honourable route.

Happiness

This is hard to come by. As long as there is an absence of sadness, consider yourself to be happy. Money does not buy happiness. It only buys moments of joy that may not last long. The feeling of happiness is hard to define. But real happiness is when you make someone else happy even if do not know them. It is like a boomerang and whatever you throw will come back to you, both good and bad.  So only throw what is good if you can.

Remember, you got your family by Karma, and it happens only once. Keep the peace with the family as when you get old they are the ones who will care for you. Please treasure every moment you can spend together because we don’t know how long it will last. After this lifetime, we won’t see each other anymore. We can only share our memories in this life.

God Bless you, My Son
Love you always.
Your Papa.

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