Many years back when I was experiencing a rift with a friend, I came across a term called kintsukoroi. They say you often get to read or hear things that you need, things that are relevant to that particular time in your life. I was experiencing a big fallout with a rather friend of mine. And there seemed no way back. Friendship I believe is a really rare blessing, so I was in the process of losing one, I was quite heartbroken.
So what is Kintsukoroi, it is the Japanese term for using melted gold or lacquer to fix broken pottery, and the belief behind it is the broken item becomes more beautiful after. The object also now carries a history so there is so much more added to it. I loved that concept because it gave me hope. After all, relationships are like that, they can break but they can be put together and it can become even more beautiful and stronger for having gone through that.
I mean think about it, every relationship has its waves, and sometimes it does break. There is nothing wrong with that. But what if we could understand, learn to forgive, and still nurture it back? (I am not referring to abusive relationships etc). And this is not just about other people, but our own functioning as well. So often in life, things that are dear to us break. Maybe it’s a project that one has invested in, maybe an idea, a business, someone has invested in. No matter how perfect the plan or relationship, things can break. But the beauty in the word ‘kintusukoroi’ is all about hope and acceptance. Hope, that things can be built back, of course, it will take a new shape and dimension but you can still create beauty from broken objects. Even if it’s a broken soul. And acceptance, that things can break.
Now, did this concept salvage my friendship? No, but that’s another thing I learnt, life is not always about fixing things either. It’s about the fine balance between learning what to fix and making it more beautiful and the wisdom to understand that not all things can be fixed, and learning to accept that and let go. Because that which is broken is also a beautiful piece of art.