Sitting at home, seeing the hike in number of COVID cases and deaths everyday, shattered my heart into pieces. We send healing prayers to the families but we will never understand the pain until we experience it ourselves.
This is a story of what a happy family had to go through, a family that I’ve known for years.
Since the patient needed oxygen support, he was admitted to hospital. Everything seemed fine initially. After few days, they had to move him to a more specialized treatment since they felt it was worth a shot.
Their family kept waiting for days and days but there was no good news, it felt like a watched pot which never boils. Every moment, the family members at home were thinking only about it and time didn’t pass. But they didn’t give up. They just had to hang in there, remain calm and patient, praying continuously with a heavy heart.
I was blessed to be there with them throughout to encourage them to be positive and patient, when I myself was impatient, when I was struggling to control my tears.
All of a sudden, his silence deafened us. Unfortunately, the situation had got out of hand. This loss caused chaos in everyone’s head. We were devastated by the loss. The day appeared gloomy. Our world was singing a sad song, all the beautiful things around us blurred for a moment. For a million times we asked God if it’s real, the answer was only yes. The family was physically, mentally, and emotionally weak, all at once. It seemed like the world fell apart. My mind was in turmoil.
All we could do is, grieve for him. I was feeling helpless, it pains me knowing that I couldn’t change the situation. But I’ve kept telling to myself that the body can be burned to ashes but the soul cannot be, it will and has always been alive.
We can talk to them with an expectation that we don’t receive any verbal response. We talk to them when we know we can’t physically hear them. They send us signs and guidance through our dreams, they protect us by watching over us all the time, they send their blessings often.
Sharing my personal experience, I saw him repeatedly in my dreams. And the dream had a hidden message which I conveyed it to his family. They were overjoyed. They started to feel his presence so strongly. Dead people shield us in the bubble of their love all the time.
I thought and tried to come up with the best way to cope up with this pain, but it’s hard to find one because this is not a temporary pain for the family. It’s a permanent void that cannot be filled by any other person. But we could do few things which might help us move forward in life.
Cry as much as you can. Cry whenever you want to, but once you stop crying, focus on what should be done to adjust or deal with this situation in your life. If you want to, then stay alone and enjoy the silent song. Don’t force yourself to get into groups. If you want to communicate with people and if you think that would change your thoughts and help you heal, please go ahead.
And the best thing during this time is having someone who says “I am here if you need me”. Talking to someone close to your heart might help you.
You definitely need time, please don’t be hard on yourself. Take your time, but be back with more strength and power. In the beginning, you’ll feel as if your world has ended, but gradually you’ll realise you have a life and you should move on, because that will make the soul of your loved one happy.
Remember the soul who has left the physical world for his ascension, but try to release your emotions. Most importantly take care of your physical health only when you can try to be emotionally stable. Don’t worry if you see that the things ahead of you are impossible to overcome, it’s natural to feel all of this, but you will get past this phase when you have control over your emotions, and that will happen with God’s grace as time progresses. Express yourself, let the feelings out, that’s when you will find yourself calm and find a new strength emerging from you. Try to get occupied with some or the other work that would divert your mind from those thoughts. Do what you love and try to love everyone around, it will return to you manifold.
The one who created the world has the same right to destroy it. Eventually, everyone has to and will leave this world. Let’s keep the departed souls in our prayers everyday. The more we try to cope up with this pain and progress in our lives, the happier the souls will be.
We miss their presence, we get depressed by their absence, but all we can do is pray for them and to them in silence while continuing to live our lives, perhaps with a deeper understanding of life and spreading love to everyone around.