Till today I had heard that with devotion also comes detachment but I am also feeling this from last 3 years.
As much as I got immersed in devotion, my mind got up from the hollow rules of the society and finally I decided that I will not have another child (I have a beautiful daughter) . If I do not bind one, then I will be able to take responsibility of other 100 children. A Second Child would mean that again I would have to be behind by five years in the fulfillment of my purpose (having orphanage & old age home).
I thought my husband and family members would understand my cause but I was wrong. It took me five years to hear my own decision.
*How can I say that I do not want to have another child?
*What will people say?
*If these people asked me to leave his home then what would I do?
If my father didn’t accept me at home, where would we live?
So many questions…..
It took the covid period for me to take my final decision. There is no one for anyone in this world, everyone has to take their own responsibility. I made my mind that first I will be self dependent. Day and night I worked hard and made money.In the third year I had my own school, I set my status in society such that no one dare to come and ask me questions. In-between this period I was already searching for my Guru but I wanted that, my Guru himself must have seen God. And one day my younger brother was listening to our divine father, Om Swami’s discourse. I heard also one of these too. Then we listened to ‘Vision of Devi’ on YouTube. Immediately we went to the library for Swami’s memorial. And splash!!!!!!!
(to be continued…..)