I was a very stubborn and work avoiding child ( who says not an adult it’s only Swamiji s grace and guidance which makes me do what ever.). Being an only child to my extremely loving  understanding and freindly parents there is not even a single incident I can remember when my father hit me or even pulled me in anger, His way to show displeasure once May be once  in 6 months was to stop talking to me for 5 minutes while I knew the key to open that lock to.It was simple… by putting my eyelashes on his feet and saying Sorry Bapu and next moment he hugged me. I think the sense of security and belongingness this gave me made me a very fearless confident and self accepting person. My mother though at times  ( maybe once in an year would have slapped me when I deliberately used to write A as V to trouble her) ,or whetn she wanted to have a 3pm to 3.40 pm siesta and I would have troubled her by screaming in her ears to tell me stories or play with me! My grandfather I remember twice hit me when I spoilt is 4 hour invested drawings by putting my ant killing skills on them to make look like that of Piccasso s( over confidence u see).On the other hand when I got married I got to know that my husband has been raised to a very good  boy with no smoking, drinking habbits and exercising aswell eating all without fuss because his parents used to regularly spank thim. He has major anger issues maybe because of that but when I got my daughter and at times it was compared by my inlaws that others kids to namaste and talk to us when we visit them and your child is least concerned, I did slap her.The worst I remember was when once when I lost my father, had a 2 year old son ,no house help to cook  and got my mother’s cataract operation .when I entered the house my daughter asked me what am I supposed to eat? She was 10 and her question was most normal but maybe I was too tired ,too hungry or too hassled with a 2 year old and 20 times eye drop putting routine for my mom s eye that I even bit her and hit her with a belt.Her grandma was home but she too was expecting me to come back and cook for all of them. I lots of times hug her and apologize to her saying Viveka I hit because I was hurt!

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