I lose You every time I hurt somebody
Every time my pride influxes my mind
My tongue slips and I chide someone
Every time I think more of myself than You
or somebody else

I lose You when I fail to control my anger
and burst out
I lose You every time I fail to do the actions
I ought to do
I lose you for many things I do
Perhaps this is the reason why only a certain
part (the tiniest part) of you is deep-seated
in my heart and the rest of You is dispersed

How can I love You completely without
embracing the things that contain You
because there’s really nothing in this world
where You are not contained in,
This is why my love is scattered in all things
I have refused to accept
And this is why I will always have only a
slice of You until I love everything that
contains You

This is why I don’t have You completely
This is why I lose You every single day in
installments, because of my weaknesses
and my rage
But somehow I refuse to have You in traces
Somehow my consciousness wants all of You
Even if it requires losing all of me.

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Chitrotpala Chaitali Dash

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