With divine grace I pen down,my driving force.I saw my master OM SWAMI Ji,eight years back.Who 

is my prabhuji as I address my master.I saw love for me ,for the first time after my mom died,like a mother’s love,and my journey began.

I started visiting ashram,regularly the days when my master used to give discourses in a small 

room,with just a few of us .Cold nights and tears flowing I used to look at my master.No facilities at the ashram like they are now,cold water,in one room six of us.

I always used to sit in front,till now it’s the same grace for the discourse.Then also tears used to flow

looking at my master,now also the same,nothing changed but the inside me.

Then I was fragile,weak,always pleasing everyone,fearful I had all the negatives.One discourse my master talked about initiation ,his way.There are levels,and when you reach lever four,then he the master takes over .THAT WAS IT,MY PURPOSE.I found it ,I had to reach there.I truthfully say I worked very hard ,and am still doing.I left no stone unturned.Forget about the roller coaster of life,but 

my PURPOSE was bigger.IT TOOK OVER ME.

I had to be worth it,was my goal.So I started doing,all my master told in his discourse,in BLACK LOTUS goals,all his teachings.

From mindfulness,love,empathy,compassion,gratitude,meditation,mantra chanting,self introspection.

And slowly I was a new me,my purpose my INTIATION from my master level Four.

I am by his grace alone in level two.And only by his grace I will reach my goal,my purpose of my life.

Its all up to my master,how worthy I am ,no questions asked,I will not give up.

With folded hands ,and at his divine feet,I bow.To mata Rani who gave my master for me she comes 

first,I bow at her lotus feet.