I saw a video of a big dog seeing a puppy, he was wagging his tail like anything and they both jumped at each other in happiness. Any dog for that matter, can not contain it’s excitement while seeing the human he loves or the other dogs and puppers that he meets.

Now I am not the biggest dog person but I do have compassion towards them and all animals. The love, unconditional love that they shower at every being is what I love the most and long for as well. I feel the same amount of excitement and love towards my friends and people I love and know. To my very very close friends, I want to jump right at them, hug them tight fill their and mine hearts with love and only love. I get excited to meet people, my people. I want to make them feel loved and cared for. Yes, I am here waiting to catch up with you, listen to you, laugh at the top of my lungs. Why can they not receive me though?

I can be very extra at times, but not to the level of embarrassing anybody. Breaking the ice, making somebody comfortable and making them feel welcomed is my thing. I have come to realize this but I get such off putting energy at times that it starts bothering me. No I am not coming running to greet my friends, but the energy tells it all. You choose to spend your time and energy on them because you want to and they mean something to you. Why can’t life and human relationship be as simple as dogs’. I know this ‘why’ has me hooked to it and now it is bothering me so I need to let go of it.

Sometimes no amount of going out and meeting people, interacting with friends and sharing laughter, can cheer one up. It is one of those times that I want to sit alone in my home, reading probably or just lazing around to overcome this gloomy, lonely feeling of not being loved and cared for. I am not needing any attention, and I am not hurt by others’ actions or words. I would have in the past, I know better now and can pull myself out of this before becoming miserable altogether. Just need to put myself in much higher regards in my heart. I put the people I can count on at such high positions that I go more than 100% while they are not ready for it. This is my way of showing my admiration and love for them. The energy I receive from them doesn’t make me feel equally highly regarded and it starts to downplay my presence and immediately my own energy goes down. I want to work on this and not be as affected by it, as I am hardly going to stop giving them the love my heart holds.

 

Peace. Much Love.

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