I have always find marriage the scariest journey of life. Whether you think you are going for love marriage or arrange marriage, it doesn’t matter the struggle will be there. Sometimes this struggle will be to establish your authority, get heard, feel cared and loved more. But it still surprises me that even though our parents and all the society is going through this struggle but again they force the new generation to go for it. Is it really marriage all about struggles or there is something beautiful that is only visible to those who understand it’s beauty while others just follow like a sheep.
Relationship no matter with whom is always difficult because it’s full of complex expectations and responsibilities. In a relationship especially of a couple there is always one who likes to take charge and other wants to be depended. In some relationship both the couple are equally active. But no matter what role you are playing there should always be some common ground of appreciation.
“If you’re lucky enough to find someone you can halfway tolerate, sink your nails in and don’t let go, no matter what.”- BoJack Horseman
I think this quote from the BoJack Horseman series explains beautifully the essence of marriage. If you want only to extract from a marriage then it will always be a struggle but if you are going to give something worthful then slowly with time you will definitely reap it’s fruit. But that worthful action and thought will vary from person to person.
I have always believed that there should be a growth mindset for you and your partner to make us feel loved and appreciated. This type of mindset always focuses on what is important by keeping aside unnecessary expectations. These beautiful lines by Nida Fazli gives a potray about what life is exactly on this earth.
“Kabhi kisi ko mukammal jahaan nahin miltaa
Kahin zameen to kahin aasmaan nahin miltaa” – Nida Fazli
Translation: No one ever gets the entire universe
Somewhere the earth and somewhere the sky is missing
The expectations will always be never ending. Everyone wants the best for themselves and there is nothing harm in having this desire but instead of dumping all our expectation on our partner shouldn’t we analyse what expectations are really worthwhile fullfilling. So finally it’s the individual choice of how we take ourselves in this journey either we can use this struggle to grow out of it or curse one another. Because no one is going to complete you, you are already complete as Swamiji always says. This is a journey with no destination, you can learn in this or you can suffer your own habits ultimately it will be your choice. I would like to end with this quote that explains exactly what are the advantages of getting married.
“I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”—Rita Rudner
I would really appreciate everyones opinion, experiences and blessings as I am planning to get married and begin a new journey.