Am I writing this down under the influence of Chitt varatti? I am not sure, since this is a first-of-its-kind experience, I would like to share it.
It started with some peeled garlic cloves that I used when cooking a vegetable dish. I must share with you that I live in a joint family with my husband, 7-year-old daughter, mother-in-law and father-in-law.
My mother-in-law got furious as she thought that I had put more than required garlic cloves in the dish and all the peeled garlics had been consumed. Since there were no maids to help during COVID-19 lockdown, my mother-in-law had to peel garlic almost all the time. If you are aware about the Indian family dynamics, you have gauged the intensity of the situation by now.
My mother-in-law shouted in rage and said many unpleasant things. Being no less a warrior myself, I retaliated with equal intensity, but as usual, my mother-in-law won the battle.
I somehow served dinner to other members sitting in the dining room. The dining room is adjacent to our kitchen and my husband has no hearing problem. Maybe he chose to remain silent and to act only if the storm were to head his way. Well, I filled my plate and shut myself in my room.
I was flushed with anger and vengeance, so much so that I thought of throwing up the dinner plate with a big bang. I also felt very lonely and defenseless in this moment. Just as I lifted my plate in fury, I looked at the food that I had prepared with much effort without a helper. How could I do this? Mind you! A maid or a helper is a big issue in India.
I then thought of the Chitt varattis active in me at that point of time. I questioned myself whether I needed any of those varattis to serve any of my purpose? The answer was ‘no’.. With that realization and off loading, I suddenly felt light. I realized how foolishly I was behaving. This made me smile and all the anguish vanished in no time.
It was a trigger and the dynamite in me exploded… The realisation helped me in cleansing my varattis or negativities in the heart…
Maybe I nailed my negativities, and in that light, I thought about my mother-in-law. I could clearly see her suffering, her old age and frail body. I could empathize with her and could certainly differentiate between the disease and the diseased. I realised that with this new awakening, I had an increased responsibility of doing my righteous karma.
So, after having my dinner in gratitude to the almighty God, I started peeling the garlic, a thing I never liked doing and honestly never did before in my life. What about my husband, you asked? Yes, he was staring at me looking for the traces of storm and devastation. I winked at him and we both smiled 🙂
Jai Shri Hari 🙂