As I write this blog, I am enjoying enchanting rain, a delicious creamy coffee and a chocolate chip cookie :D. Life indeed is beautiful.

This blog is what I have learnt from reading and listening to thought-provoking author Robert Greene. In my humble opinion, he is the Carl Jung of today’s era.

I have always been a distracted kid. So much so, there were times I was so distracted that I could not differentiate if I am distracted or focused. I often think opposite extremes of a few things feel similar.

Increasing attention span, focus and concentration is my favorite topic to read and learn about. In my last blog I talked about dopamine and reducing one’s stimulus threshold. This led to excavate a little deeper into the concept of concentration and attention span.

And I gained a few insights from Robert Greene’s book “The Laws of Human Nature”. Well, to be honest these are not really my insights rather what I read and internalized.

NARCISSISM is something we always associate with other people having it and we never associate with ourselves. If we analyse classic narcissistic style, it is often associated with exaggerated grandiose appearance of oneself. Robert Greene says many of us have narcissistic tendencies, but a few are toxic narcissists to whom he labeled as “Deep Narcissists”. Narcissism arises from the early childhood excessive enmeshment or abandonment by parents or care-takers (one of the several reasons).

Now moving on, I would often wonder why some people need excess stimulus or dopamine as compared to others. Some people have ingrained capacity to sit and stay focused at tasks (Brian Tracy gang) more than others. My interpretation of this phenomenon has lead to the conclusion that it depends a great deal on the sense of inner fulfillment.

People with emptiness (narcissism) tend to seek external stimulus to feel adequate or for their brain to release dopamine giving them the “kick” to experience a sense of grandiosity. This in turns reduces one’s attention span or focus compromising the quality of work they produce. This leads to further emptiness and exaggerated need for the stimulus. Another aspect of fluctuation of a narcissistic mind is that since they do not have a logical sense of self or self-esteem, they constant worry about what others think of them.

Stimulus could be anything, it is upon the Moral Police Officers to label it as right or wrong. For my understanding, anything deviating from your subject of focus is a stimulus, external or internal.

How to fill your void or emptiness? It is extremely subjective and individualistic thing. For nothing can actually fill the black hole like human void. But we can make ourselves feel content or at peace by meditation. Meditation gives us a realistic idea about oneself. This realism helps us stay grounded and we would eventually not need to wear the grandiose mask of narcissism. This in turn would steadily and ultimately reduce the urge for external stimulus.

This reduction in urge to seek outside for stimulus will eventually increase one’s concentration.

·         First, we should boldly acknowledge the possibility of (if) having narcissistic tendency in us.

·         Contemplating on what emptiness are we trying to fulfill by displaying the balloon of narcissism.

·         Followed by, what emotions are generated when our seek for external stimulus is sufficed?

·         Can I replicate them within? Internally? Through the ocean of bliss existing in me?

In my own journey navigating the bliss in me, I have found Build Self-Esteem Pack in Black Lotus App is really helpful.

Finding your purpose (the most cliché thing) is extremely important in bridging the gap between narcissism and self-love and eventually better concentration.

Going in the state of flow where you lose track of time is one of the most fulfilling experiences in my humble opinion which can only be attained by capacity of staying course on one thing without being distracted or bored.

I’d conclude my cacography with hilarious joke from Beloved Swamiji’s blog :-

“I once read a quote, “That’s enough of me talking about myself. Now, let’s hear you talk about me.” This sums up a narcissistic person.”

What are your views about relationship between Narcissism and Focus?

 

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