Last month we lost a relative of mine to the covid monster. He was an interesting man who I always admired. Despite his seemingly hard life, you could never see him down or in a low spirit.

In a way, he was a role model for me. A huge man with light blue eyes and deep wrinkles across his forehead which made his eyes look as if he is always smiling. He was the kind of guy who was mostly up to something but never actually made it with his entrepreneurial endeavors, and despite that, there was something about him that would not let you call him a failure. In a way I am also similar, I guess. You could not say that I had a successful marriage or relationship, or a career, or a business but somehow, I don’t have grudges or bitterness towards life and I always have a project I believe in, however stupid it may appear. And besides this created this strong desire to transform and curiosity to look for new ways, that somehow led me to Om Swami.
The story goes as I heard it, and the way I heard it does not have to be true but it suits him well, they say he had a stroke and his wife failed to notice it somehow so for a day or so he was lying helpless, conscious, or semiconscious, until he was noticed and taken to a hospital, where he got the COVID and fell in comma until the end.

The thing is that the last two or three years his body did not allow him to work, and to work he was addicted, always had horses, cows, or different animals, fields with vegetables, he believed would be the real hit to sell, but his health would simply not allow him to work. His legs and back practically stopped functioning. Being in bed I personally never heard him complain. He was working on a system to predict the results from the football games in the euro football lottery and put quite an effort into it. He wrote volumes of notebooks with numbers, coefficients results facts from championships in different countries. Watching him I thought this is probably the way how investors follow indexes and diagrams and different markets. And he was doing it with a passion and conviction that I don’t remember seeing too often.

For some people that were not close to him or didn’t know him well it may appear that the way he left was as a misfortune or painful, but I am convinced he never experienced even the slightest desperation. What confirmed my belief was the fact that after being in a coma for 2 days, when his children came back from abroad to see their father, on the evening before his death he woke up shortly, opened his eyes and he asked  whether anyone went and placed his bet in the lottery. Then he told them to make sure to go and place the bet tomorrow before falling back into a coma and then, dying. I believe he died with the firm conviction that he got it. He figured it out.

Right now I am doing the pack, live a life with awareness, with Nitya Shanti from the black lotus app and I was thinking about the way we are aware of the things that we are  grateful for, changes our perspective towards life and no matter how hard it looks to not get caught in negativity and not let the desperation get us, the fact is that the more things we find in our lives to be grateful for the happier we are. And life is such that there are a lot of things even in the storm of adversities, even when we are losing our life. But it doesn’t always have to be painful and hopeless. So rest in peace Czvetan the Sixfingered.