There is something that I have been learning for the past few years now! Not everyone is meant to stay in our life. People come and go. And there are only a few people who stay forever. There is something else that we need to remind us i.e. ‘We don’t know about forever, but there are a few people who give true happiness. Those are the ones we need to spend time with.’

This can also start a conversation on ‘We are humans, we need people and we must be able to talk and communicate with everyone even if they don’t give you true happiness.’ But let’s keep that one for later!

Today, I want to share something that happened with me a few days back. A few days back I met a bunch of people. It was almost about 2 years since I had not met new people. I was anxious. I knew a few from some time but the rest were like brand new to me. Those were my best friend’s best bunch of people. Hence, I knew a few of them. She believed in (I don’t know what) but said to me that I would have a great time with them. I was really anxious when I met them. But a simple act of dancing on some of our favourite tracks and singing and playing can be enough to connect with people. I connected with them and we had some of the best times together. I am still in touch with them. They are really great bunch of people but importantly, they treated me with respect and they never judged me. I guess that is enough to make someone feel safe; which I do when I am around them.

This got me thinking, “Why does this happen rarely?” The simple answer is Respect-Trust-Attitude

Simple, these bunch of friends didn’t see me as an outsider, they welcomed me into the group with open arms. Never judged me for who I am. All they had in mind was to spend some great time together.

I have observed people judging me for being me. I have received comments on changing my behaviour, attitude to be amongst a group of people. People judged my body, smile, laughter and what I say or speak. This crushed my self-confidence and it took me years to build that. Now, when I look back on those days, I feel bad but those taught me some very important lessons in my life. I have seen people treating some below their level in offices and colleges differently than the ones at the same level. We never know how our behaviour can affect someone or in what way.

”We should always keep good feelings and affection at heart”, my grandmother always says. When I was young I never understood it. But now when I am old enough to understand, I feel bad for those people who have to go through such treatment. I always pray for mercy if I have hurt anyone and I try not to do that again.

As said, we never know about forever, and the fear creeps in especially with those with who we have connected. We fear them leaving us and going off. But again, why do we want to waste time on that? I have sensed this fear recently, but I am teaching myself to let go of the fear and live in the moment. I speak what my heart says and I dance to songs that I really want to. I enjoyed songs always. But I am trying to letting go of the fear that creeps in. We all must do that. Because we fear and waste time. That time is worth enough to enjoy the life that we are living. Alone or together with your people, totally on you! But living life is important and worth it. 

I won’t say, forget the treatment, move on, accept yourself today and live the best life tomorrow. This is not even possible. But I will surely say, “Forgive those who may have hurt you, you will feel relaxed. Try accepting one quality of yours at a time and move ahead. There is nothing wrong with you unless your heart says so. And hence I say, spend time with you and those who give true happiness. We live life once (I don’t about re-births, rather I am not worthy enough to say something on it) and let us live it HAPPILY!

I hope, this post inspires at least one to accept one quality of theirs and love them a little more than yesterday!

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Madhumita Bhadkamkar

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