Trading the dusty, uneven, 

Tiring path for years,

For her attainment, I bore

Many sorrows, pains and fears.

And finally reaching her doorsteps,

I broke into joyful tears.
Thinking — since all my life I toiled just for her,

The moment our eyes would meet, 

We would lovingly embrace each other.

Not to be separate again, but to be one forever.

With extreme love, With all my heart out,

I called her aloud but uttering no word.

She came out and looked at me,

But our eyes did not meet.

She looked plainly and went past me,

Without acknowledging my presence.

With pounding heart, feeling betrayed,

With  teary eyes and a burning chest,

 And with choking throat, I stood there, 

For how long, I don’t remember.

Consciousness came after long, but undisturbed, 

And mind minted not a single word,

I just kept looking at my burning heart and calm breath,

With no resistance and no complaint.

Shreds of suffering still kept coming,

but I sensed, signs of peace arriving.

Having crushed mercilessly,

Mind remained defeated at bay,

With no power to have any say.

Then peace engulfed me with all its might,

Filling fully the body, mind and heart.

I forgot everything and felt, 

Ever joyful and ever light.

And I heard her whisper from nowhere,

Everloving, ever blissful light filling every pore.

Oh dear, Your mind, ego and desires,

I had to crush and destroy,

As from that burning heart only, stems the lasting joy.

From dying of old, only can new arise,

Know Oh dear that suffering is the surest way,

To see the new blissful  Skies.

***

PS: Is it not that in everyday life we do our best, stretch ourselves, for something and someone, expecting that, that one would bring happiness and fullness in life? But, alas, most of the time those expectations get crushed, leaving us dejected with a burning heart. But, if we could dive deep into that burning and suffering, we may find that through this the Life is pushing us on the way to lasting happiness and peace. Think about it!!!

Om Shanti!!!    

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Nandkumar

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