It was the cold night of 24th December, 2021.  As is the way of my profession,I have no set hours of work 🙃 as I am an obstetrician and gynecologist.Though I had a difficult and busy day on the 24th,back from hospital around 10 PM, I slipped into bed knowing very well that within a few hours I would have to rush to the hospital again.Exactly at 1:45 AM, I got an emergency call and I headed towards the hospital immediately. Strangely, I was calm and not at all irritated at the prospect of going to the hospital in the freezing weather(leaving the comforts of warm quilt) past midnight. I remembered the days prior to meeting Swamiji,how annoyed I used to get while working at unusual hours. In fact, when I used to get night calls, it was always incredibly frustrating.With Swamiji’s teachings, I have come to terms with the fact that this is part of my profession and since I have to do it, I might as well do it peacefully. 

My hospital is about 6 kms from where I stay, I reached there in 15 minutes and assessed the situation of the patient. It was her first baby, and hence I knew she would take time to deliver.Though she was full dilated but baby was still not in a proper position.The situation didn’t look very promising. What was I supposed to do?

I had to make a choice. Either I could go for a caesarean delivery straight away or wait for some more time and then decide.Taking such decisions is easier one in daytime, but at night, calling a team of an anaesthetist, a paediatrician and an OT assistant is not an easy task!  Remember, in Haridwar, it’s quite cold in December! 

I arranged all the emergency back-ups and put the foetal monitor to make sure foetal heart is regular.Though the patient was getting exhausted, I kept comforting her. I could understand what she was going through. Amongst the deafening silence of night, the cries of a patient in labour and the beeping noise of the monitors is not something one wishes to hear!

What would happen? Would the patient deliver vaginally or go into obstruction?

Exhaustion took over me with too much of a noise in my head and confusion about decisions, and  I surrendered to the Divine. 🙏 As is the human way, when you are  in distress, who do we call upon,if not Divine?

I thought of ways to connect to Divine and  decided to take a nearby chair and sit in meditation,right there in labour room!

Though I am not a great meditator, I chanted His name continuously with one-pointed concentration, watching my breath all the while. It sent a wave of peace over me.I could feel His presence with me.

 I reassessed the patient, there was progress, but not significant.It was 3 AM in the morning. It almost looked like the baby was stuck! It’s one of the nightmares for an obstetrician. Either way there is so much risk involved. At this stage,even ceserian delivery poses lot of risk to mother and baby both 😟But I was calm. One would ask how?

Because apart from being a doctor, I am a devotee, surrendered to our divine Master Om Swami, so I did what a devotee would do- kept chanting and kept waiting patiently for His Grace. I waited and waited and waited.  And my wait, of course  was not in vain.

And then it happened!🥰😍 

The baby was delivered at 4 AM and cried well  immediately! The baby was stuck as he had the cord around his neck and still, there was no distress!In my years of practice, I had not witnessed such miracle! Yes,it’s no less than a miracle for me & the parents. Only Divine Grace pulled us all through very difficult times!

Why am I telling you these things and what does it even have to do with being a devotee?

I have been practicing for the last 20 years and  I have experienced numerous such challenges.But was my reaction always like this? Was the outcome the same? No! Definitely not!

Whenever complications used to happen, I used to feel scared and hopeless! Sometimes I used to even start crying 🙄 Imagine the scene… a patient is in pain or bleeding profusely, and the treating doctor crying because of frustration? Sometimes if baby’s heart rate was going down,mine would go up and that stress spilled over to my staff and family😔. I have lived with so much stress for years prior to meeting Swamiji that I was sick of my profession. 

The long work hours, unpredictable and odd times of emergencies, bringing up 2 young kids had taken such toll on me that I hated being a doctor! I never wanted to become a doctor in the first place 😕 It was a family decision  that I had to honour! 

But what’s my life like now after becoming a devotee of the greatest Master of our times?

I am at peace with everything around me. 🙏 When I am stuck in a situation like this I keep faith that He is there for me, taking care of me, looking after me and that faith does absolute wonders ♥ Helping and healing so many people!

With my patients, I try to be as compassionate as I can. I practice gentle breathing during my OPD so that when I talk to someone even for few minutes, I give them my whole attention 🙂 That’s what heals them. That’s my faith. I never start any procedure without a prayer to Sri Hari, knowing realizing very well that He is the cause and effect of everything. ❤ 

So, in the last few years, inspite of being an obstetrician, life is no longer a roller coaster but a smooth ride where Swamiji is the guiding light!  🙏

How my life has changed from being stressful to blissful, only a devotee would know! 😊😊

The journey of a doctor devotee continues…

All glories to Swamiji 🙏

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Sonali Om

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