Someone’s gotta break it to you. And I volunteer as tribute.
Meditation, breathing exercises, thinking positively, and journaling will not solve your life’s problems. Nor will sageing your house. Or your head.
No matter what your coach is telling you.
There I said it, and I feel better already.
Writing this has been weighing heavily on my chest. I was waiting for the right moment to put my thoughts in a blog. Is there a better time than another, though, to talk about such a topic?
This morning I heard what Allan Watts answered when asked to give his advice on writing, and I knew this was my sign.
“Advice? I don’t have advice. Stop aspiring and start writing. If you’re writing, you’re a writer.
Write like you’re a goddamn death row inmate and the governor is out of the country, and there’s no chance for a pardon.
Write like you’re clinging to the edge of a cliff, white knuckles, on your last breath, and you’ve got just one last thing to say, like you’re a bird flying over us and you can see everything, and please, for God’s sake, tell us something that will save us from ourselves.
Take a deep breath and tell us your deepest, darkest secret, so we can wipe our brow and know that we’re not alone.
Write like you have a message from the king.
Or don’t. Who knows, maybe you’re one of the lucky ones who doesn’t have to.”
If you know about me, I know what you are thinking. “She teaches meditation? And it’s precisely because I am a meditation instructor that I feel qualified to say what I believe.
Hear me out,
if you are going through anything right now… Anything at all: confusion, a breakup, sadness, stress, feeling overwhelmed, divorce, any loss, I hear you. I have been through all of these, including a near-death experience, and I know how the pit in your stomach seems to get bigger and bigger, no matter what day it is, what you eat, and how much you sleep.
Out of desperation and because your best friend told you it worked for him/ her you turn to any of the practices mentioned at the beginning of this article, trusting them to solve your misery; alas, I’m here to tell you, these will let not soothe your pain.
Don’t get me wrong, all these are fantastic techniques, including using specific crystals for your chakra and yoga asana. They are a definite plus to help you keep your head above water, make you better at life, strengthen you to deal with adversities and heartbreaks, and give you a push when you need it the most to not succumb to desperation.
Yet, and it’s a capital, bold YET if you don’t dare to look inside, find the cause of your pain, accept it, love it, understand it is part of you, forgive yourself and move on, yes, move on, you will continue to feel stuck.
How do I know this?
Because I was once the person who did not want to get out of bed, I felt so broken inside; small shattered pieces of glass sitting right at the center of my chest. No matter how deeply I reached to get them out, I couldn’t get to them.
Everything was dark and desperate; a castaway left alone at night on a deserted island in the middle of the ocean. No one was coming to rescue me; above all, I could not save myself.
Until I realized that the profound experience of suffering was necessary for me to make the changes I had to, so I could be the person I was supposed to be before my limiting beliefs, negative self-talk, and destructive coping mechanism took over my head and heart.
Then and only then I discovered the healing power of meditation, the miracle that is following your breathing, how you can co-create a life you are happy with with your pen and paper, how counting your blessings attracts more abundance, and how ultimately you are way more powerful than your brain wants you to know. Trust me; this is no new age, bs.
The moral of the story?
You are not trapped.
You are not a victim of circumstances and your past.
You are capable of great things.
Use your suffering as a propeller to push you forward toward the life that was meant for you before you stopped believing in yourself.
You are not alone, and you are loved.
May your heart be at peace. At least for today.
Thanks for being here with me.
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