Hi Freinds
It’s Me Anupamaa once again ,my apologies for taking such a long gap and writing but the break was much needed vacation for my soul .Now refreshed ,energised and more clear about my purpose in life in my Gurus presence ,here i am on my journey path once again.
In my last post (part2) i finished it by telling my grief and now the first lesson i learned was that in GRIEF YOU ARE ALONE.No one is with you but you yourself feeling the pain ,the anguish ,the loss and the trick to survival .others are there but everyone has their own definition of grief ,an interpretation entirely different than yours .worst is when all are trying to look for a solution in that harrowing time when you are still greiving and confused and pained beyond words from the death of your child . people are suggesting you to move on with comforting words ,words which has no meaning for you at that point and when you are questioning God ,when you are surrounded by all sort of why me,what have i done to deserve this ,why god is so cruel ,why he did not listen to my prayers ,is it my past life’s karma and so on and on and on ,mind boggling questions with no answers except god’s will from wise old men and women.And your mind thinking what kind of God would do such a thing and your faith crumbling and shattering of an entire teachings on god’s kindness , compassion and miracles is in deep doldrums, whatever was taught to you about God was all proving false at this point .With ease people were going on with their daily lives ,me and family too but my mind and heart were in two different directions,mind was unfaithful towards God but heart was loyal to his grace and this pull was killing me .no one had an idea that a new spiritual world was opening in front of me ,a world i was never aware of ,a world which had so many worlds hidden in it ,a world which was full of mysteries,secrets ,mystics ,saints ,other life forms and things beyond our imagination

Thank you
Anupamaa

To be continued