From where is this sweetheart desire came from? It pinches me, it excites me, it drives me up and down but still annoyingly far away. It is setting the way for me, from light to the dark. It’s enveloping me with the sheer warmth of expectation of sweet but haven’t touched me real. I enjoys this pleasant experience of about to getting this bliss. Each day I start with unrelenting effort to conquer and at the end it keeps a good distance with me. Days passed and I still …

Years passed but the quest was not complete, the struggle devoid of desired results. A thought came if this remain the same on the moment of death then…aghast I was.

In these many years I ran and ran hard in pursuit of the fragrance I might have reaching the milestone but was always a stop behind. This unreal mirage has robbed me of the real happiness I might have. It controlled me and have not ever let me feel the real bliss I was surrounded with. Or I should say I let it control me, but why? After much deliberation I found it was my liking’s and shortcomings to various aspects of life which gave birth to the desires I have and are just part of me as this real body. Once I found I am not good at something and I want, it will keep me engaged in its pursuit. And I also found that desire never come alone, it seems to be one but have multitude of them attached with it. One desire lead to other and other leads to some other, this keeps on going.

They are unending.

For something unreal like dream I was shutting eyes for the real, fool I was. Lets wake up and see the sun around, feel its real warmth, smell the sweetness of flowers which are forgiving, enjoy the company of people who are different yet connected, touch the caring water determined to clean dirt within you, experience the freshness the air throwing and ‘Desire not to Desire’…….

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Ashwani Agarwal

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