Today on the occasion of Guru Poornima, I couldn’t help but write this post. But what do I write? I seriously lack in expressing myself in words, that’s why hardly any posts from myside:) But still I will try to write something.
I was walking this path called life in full ignorance harboring all kind of negative emotions namely disappointment, anger, feeling of worthlessness and helplessness. This though I have a beautiful family consisting me, my husband and my two lovely kids. Might be something to do regarding my career not going very well( I so easily blamed it on my luck then). As Swamiji says If You want to succeed in anything you have to give it time and practice, practice and practice! That was definitely what I lacked in since, family was my first priority and looking after two kids took much of my time. Anyways to cut a long story short, I was not ready to look into my tendencies and was always blaming my luck for anything that happened against my wish.
I have already mentioned how Swamiji graced me in my first post, but I would like to say that the very first time I read about Him was almost 2 years ago in the book Om Swami as we know Him by Sadhvi Vrinda Ji and Swami Vidyananda ji(for which I am extremely extremely grateful!). I was so awed by the experiences mentioned in it. But still my mind took over and i continued being ignorant and living the same kind of life. But Swamiji’s Grace is too kind, compassionate to bestow it upon me when I was not even looking for it consciously. How following Swamiji’s teachings has changed my thinking pattern. It really made me stop and think! What I was doing, was it really making any difference to anyone? Now, when things go wrong, I try to work more on myself. Trying really hard to peel off layers of ignorance, no where near it but gonna keep trying:)
And after reading so many wonderful posts by all the wonderful devotees specially their experience with Swamiji, I feel so grateful to be in such a place amongst all you wonderful people and under constant Grace of Our Beloved Swamiji. Blessed I do feel.
May soon I become worthy of Swamiji’s Darshan in person !
Swamiji, please accept my obeisance at Your Lotus Feet.