What is fear? Can we overcome from it?
It is also a feeling like any other feelings i.e. love, anger, hate, jealousy etc. Does this fear come from being born within us, according to me, it may not be the answer. We have already been a fighter when we entered our mother’s womb, at that time we had struggled with millions of sperms, then we took our place. And got a chance to see this beautiful world.
After taking birth, we then grew up with our family, society, school and religion, whatever we notice in this environment , we start learning the same thing. We learn to express emotions from all of them. So fear is also learnt from there. It is not that there should not be any fear, but how much and how should it be, as if a small child has to show a little fear. But how and how much depends on it.
I started my journey of life in similar way, I also learnt many things, out of which there was also a sense of fear. In my childhood, I had witnessed domestic violence, physical and mental abuse. It was very painful experience. Several times it occurred to my mind that I should face into it this but she was extremely loyal.
At that time, I felt pity and anger why she did not stop him.
Why did she let all this happened?
I could not understand what to do?
Sometimes I thought that him being alcoholic was the reason. But reality was he had anger issues.
I grew through all this!
Grown up, now it has reduced a little, but it has not ended.
His priorties were never been his kids too. Once I had a small operation. As always, he did not have time to visit me to hospital or even call me. My younger sister and a friend were there with me. On the day of getting discharged, She rang saying he is beating her very badly and started pouring hot oil on her. She had locked herself in the room to escape.
After the call, I got so angry that I told my friend to drive the car as fast as possible to reach home.
Anyway we covered the route of about 20 kms and as soon as I reached my home. As soon as I went inside, I picked up a big stick and stood in front of him. He started giving excuses to save himself.
I asked, Why did you raise your hand? If you every do this again, no one will be worse than me.”
Since that day till today he has not raised his hand on her. He gets angry and abusive but there is a fear in his mind.
In this way gradually, I started working on him and raised my voice against the wrong doing.
Just two months back, as I have written in my Miracles of Surrender post that something happened in college. Although, I have resigned wishfully and become jobless. As I am unable to work in such negative environment where my mental health is getting affected. I really feel very bad when students come with lots of complains and I am not able to solve their college issues due to lack of support from college.
I have faith in God. He will take care of me.
Last week, a student , a friend of one of my students, not even from my college. She was very upset because it was not even a year since her marriage that her husband had started beating her. She came to me for counselling. After taking the session I asked her, what she wanted? She said, I don’t want to be with him.
The next day she called me, and asked if I could walk with her to the police station as she wanted to register a complaint.
I said yes without thinking any consequence. That day after college, we went there and registered complain against her husband and it was almost 9 o’clock in the night.
The boy apologised to her and now he also wants to come to me for counselling.
When I returned to my room at night, some people intimated me that he is from Kashmir, I should not help people like this and many more things. I respect their concern and grateful also.
But my answer to all of them was and will continue to be so that if death is written like this, then let it be. But I cannot see wrong things.
And if someone asks me for such help, I can’t refuse just to keep myself safe.
And today I can say with full confidence that yes, I have overcome my fear.
I feel very free when I live without fear and live life
And because of all this, I have come to this place and have gone to the link where I am not afraid of losing anyone.
“JAHI VIDHI RAAKHE RAAM, TAHI VIDHI RAHIYE”
Note: Thank you so much Swamiji for giving me the courage to write this. I would also like to thank my siblings and friend to encourage me.