Hello my precious readers! Today I was just thinking about the topic of my blog when a friend of my husband visited us along with his wife. It was a tea time visit. We started discussion about the challenges my daughter is facing in her studies. Mr. and Mrs. Batra, the guests have two children. Their daughter Myra is pursuing BDS. She is super intelligent, very studious, self sufficient and all time topper. Their son Kanav on the other hand is not so studious and is pursuing B. Tech.
Myra is now facing some problems due to her ‘always be a topper’ approach. Being egoistic, arrogant, non cooperative and stressful are the byproducts of this approach for which she may be was first motivated and appreciated by her parents only. She is now thinking to leave her BDS in between and thereby passing her stress to her parents also who were always feeling so proud of her.
My husband used to compare our daughter to Myra by giving her examples, like How brilliant she is, how much self sufficient and focused she is. I never liked that comparison.
But today, i noticed that Myra’s parents were feeling so happy while talking about their son Kanav, who is intelligent but a mediocre student. Seeing his sister’s attitude of taking too much stress to secure top position in her studies, this boy had decided that he don’t want to run this race. He is an all rounder though. Happy, jolly, sincere but putting normal hard work in his studies. I noticed a shine in their eyes while they were telling us about Kanav’s attitude.
This observation again ensured what I have learnt till now about life , that our top most goal in life is to keep ourselves and thereby everybody in our connection happy, light hearted and totally stress free, while being sincere towards our duties.
We do not feel good or appreciate our child when he/she start taking too much stress in life but the fact is that we, the parents only, teach our children how to take stress in life. We ourselves put them in competition and many parents pressurise their children to secure top position every where. Those tender and pure hearts start learning from us,all sort of harmful human traits like comparison, greed, jealousy,ego,which are really harmful for them at their soul level.
Really everyone, spiritual and mindful parenting is the need of the hour. Let’s not compare ourselves with our parents’ parenting style and claim that we are doing the needful. Remember there is a very different scenario now a days as compared to our childhood. We had freedom to run and play in the streets. We were not confined to our rooms and it’s not that we spent most of our time with our parents or on mobile or television screens.
Today’s child is observing and learning most of the behavioral aspects from their parents. So what they are learning if our parenting is not that mindful? They are learning, to loose temper on little things, to take stress, to disrespect our near ones, to disrespect and to ignore their own body mind and soul, and they are learning that life is just to collect money and achieve status. Moreover when parents loose temper or speak anything poor about their child, then those things just gets imprint on his subconscious mind and those imprints become his self beliefs which go with him throughout his life until he does some shadow and inner work when he enters his spiritual journey. Yes his whole life revolves around those self beliefs from childhood.
So let’s improve ourselves in this concept of spiritual and mindful parenting and let’s take care of the stuff we imprint on those tender hearts ❤💞👍