I want to be near her and I want to see her, but I can’t. So I have to pacify myself by saying she is there, just not visible to me.

My mind doesn’t consider it to be the truth and this causes pain in my heart. So every night I close my eyes and try to see her, I see her wearing a red Saree, she has Alta on her soft glowing feet.

I go and rest my head on her lap, I hold her hand she touches my hair, but I can’t feel her because she is in my imagination.

So I go and rest my head on my mother’s lap. Now this time, I can feel the touch, she runs her fingers through my wavy hair and this time I do feel her.

I do. 

I realised she was already present in the mother who gave birth to me. Wow, such a fool I have been.