How did you all first become aware of Her ?

I am sure no two answers will be the same; but we will agree that at some point in our lives She made her presence felt. Our stories about it brim with emotion and the inexplicable experience is often beyond words. What changes is that from that point onward,  you just know.

I had often wondered about that point in my life and why after it I still didn’t just know. No instantaneous faith blossomed in my heart, no transformation of belief. My educated mind was quick to nip such ideas in the bud as irrational and undesirable. So, I started reading and researching to find an explanation to what had happened to me. I read about people from many walks of life, scientists included, recounting various experiences none of which seemed rational or logical to me. One thing became clear though, they all understood Her through their life’s work, pursuits to which they had given their mind, heart and soul.

I disliked my work as a lawyer and had been forced into becoming one even though I had wanted to study languages and literature. In the murky world of litigation I had completely lost my connection to linguistics until one day I read a treatise on metaphors! Something clicked and I experienced synaesthesia, this time without drugs; at times I could see the code embedded in the sound of words, in the very structure of grammar and knowing.  Remarkable insights about language came unbidden to me and wisdom that is gained through years of study, I came to just know intuitively. The story of Kalidas no longer felt incredible and my mind bowed accepting it’s ignorance and limitation. Humility was the first flower to blossom in the darkness of my heart.

But I am deviating from the point of my first post which is to offer an eulogy to Her, for gracing my life with a Guru like Swami, who accepts me for all that I am and not.

The Mother is a metaphor and we all Her metaphorical children. I just know She sent this poem to me to tell my mind that She is listening and I need not worry so much.

What words can describe?
You. 

No sound can adjective,
Your quality. 

What noun can seek! 
Your form.

You. 
Mother, Divine. 
 
You act through verbs, 
they are but Your play. 

You,
Cast all colour.

Myriad magical mazes.
Amazes!

I am deluded. 
Beloved.

Lit light 
blindingly dark. 

Sounded sound 
loudly silent. 

Thought thought
thoughtfully thoughtless. 

Unknowable unknown 
knowingly unknown.

This is of and about Her!
Her aspects, forms and plays.

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Nikunj Om

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