This is a story from my personal experience. I was a bright student in engineering, technically sound, confident and futuristic. I had great faith in myself, so did my parents and teachers. After my graduation, I went to Bengaluru for further studies. It was a six month long intensive course, followed by lots of lucrative placement opportunities. I studied hard, worked through the six months honestly.

Towards the end of the course, reputed companies started coming in for campus interviews. I, being a bright, confident, hardworking student, was expected to get placed quickly in the first few interviews. As you may have guessed by now, it didn’t happen. We (the family) were so confident that our dominant first reaction was of surprise rather than sadness! Almost as if companies are failing to judge the right talent.

Nonetheless, I kept trying, keeping my confidence high, revising everything I have studied, making notes of the mistakes from past interviews. And as you may expect, I got placed in a nice company. (Hey, wait for the twist, this can’t be a story!)

So I got placed, we were happy, more than half of our class (of 60) was still waiting for the placement. As per the rule, once you are selected, you can’t attend the next interviews from campus. Rightly so, they want to provide the chance to those who are not placed. So I was removed from the list of students available for interview.

Then this company came, in one clean sweep, they selected 90% of the remaining students! Suddenly, everyone who can be placed was placed somewhere.

And now, when almost everyone was placed, that letter came. The company that had selected me, had decided to unselect me for some unknown reason.

There I was, one among a very few jobless! With a lost chance of attempting the interview where almost everyone was selected. It was as if someone pranked me out of a feast, and when I came back, the feast was over. Since everyone was placed, I had to wait for the next batch for another six months to appear interviews again. I don’t remember what happened this time, but in the end, I wasn’t selected anywhere.

That talented, hardworking, honest, confident student, had to leave Bengaluru without a job.

This helped me realise, that the world is not just about you. Your confidence, your talent, your honesty, your wish, is not the only thing that matters. There is another player in the game, and that is the world itself! The world that includes everything, the universe, including you. Bramhand (ब्रह्माण्ड) as we call it.

Most interestingly, when I started on the path of spirituality, I met this second character of my story. The world, the universe, the bramhand, he is none other than my beloved Shri Krishna! I suddenly realised that It was ‘the universe’ rooting for Arjun to fight and win. It was the universe that Maa Yashoda saw in Kanhiayya’s mouth.

I was elated to know that it was him playing this game of life along with me. Everything looked different in this light. I re-visited some texts, stories, re-read Rashmirathi by Kavi Dinkar, I had a different understanding this time. I obviously wanted to know more which I understood is the task for a lifetime (or probably more).

Meanwhile, I also understood that I don’t actually need to know him (for my daily life at least). In fact, he is there to abstract away the complexities of bramhand for me. I can simply focus on my work and leave the rest to him. It is a simple deal, a deal of a lifetime – whatever I can control, is mine, whatever I can’t is his.

As of now, I control a little, I don’t even control my mind. I intend to expand my field of control, till the point ‘I’ dissolve and merge with my beloved Shri Krisha!

To give closure to the story, I stopped looking for jobs after coming from Bengaluru. Later I started a business that worked fairly well. I never had any hard feelings about those days, my institute, the company that first selected and then rejected me. I like to accept those events as they were. They were bad, I would have loved to do a job in those companies. I am happy where I am, but when I see my friends from that path, I feel I would have been happy there as well. 

Hope you enjoyed a piece of my journey to understand Shri Krishna. What is your story? Do you have a similar one?