Leena called a carpenter home for estimation of some work that she wanted to get done. He gave the estimate and she found that it was over her budget. So, typically she told the man I will consult my husband and let you know.
From the hopeful directed to her she realized that he badly needed this job and would wait to hear from her. Later, she consulted her husband and realized that the estimate was seriously over their budget for the allotted work.
Now, she faced the typical question – How to say No?
First option was not to respond, hoping that he would eventually realize that it meant a no.
Second option was to wait for him to contact her and then say No.
Or, was there a new way? Well, there was one but it meant that she would have to face her fear – of saying No. She would have to call him and say – No. The thought brought discomfort and awkwardness.
It would be so easy to choose the first option – no response as it felt safe and easy. It was good and standard… evasion was easy and comfortable…You didn’t have to face the situation head-on and neither did you have to explain yourself or say anything negative to the opposite person.
Even the second option – waiting for him to contact her sounded good! As she would face the situation only when it came to her. Why before?
But today for the first time she questioned herself, was it the right response? Do I like it when someone keeps me hanging before saying a No? Do I not wait with dashed hopes and then curse the person for not informing me and wasting my time and energy?
Realization hit her that the carpenter too would wait for her and then maybe curse her for not informing her earlier. She did not wish for his negative energy to be directed towards her.
Despite her discomfort she made a new decision and chose the third option! With courage and grit, she dialed his number. He tried to bargain with her when she told him about her decision but that didn’t help the pricing. So, she managed to turn him down politely. Thus, ending the conversation on a stable note.
She felt so relieved and light that she had faced the situation. She had been able to say No that too politely, clearly, without getting agitated and hurting the carpenter’s sentiments. He was now free to look out for other opportunities. And she had faced her fear of saying No. She felt happy and free!
With a smile on her face she resolved to face such situations whenever possible, without evasions. She knew this was a very small incident and easy as the opposite person was a near stranger. It would be tough with close family, friends and colleagues. But then you begin with small steps, don’t you?