This covid time has given us lots of time to pause, reflect and focus on the things which are really important for us. As most of us are working from home hence extra benefit of this is that we are not very active socially, except on the social media.

This time has really helped me in  reevaluating my personal boundaries and have a new appreciation for the need of them and the freedom within. Boundaries empower us by protecting our personal space and energy. They give clear indication to others where we want to get involved and where we don’t. 

No,  I am not saying that  interaction with people is not good but problem comes when consciously or subconsciously we start imbibing negative energy of others  whom we spend majority of our time with.  We all know that being a social animal human’s have a basic  need  to  socialize and it is also necessary  to retain our sanity. 

However, sometimes in offices or in our social circle there are  a few people who are like energy vampires, full of negativity , always complaining, ready to find faults in everything. Spending time with them generally exhausts us emotionally. No matter how much we try to keep ourselves positive but a few   splatters of their negativity fall on our mind too.  We get stuck in situations which unnecessarily creates stress.

Hence it is necessary to set some personal boundaries.   These boundaries may be physical, mental or emotional  which  separate us from others and define us who we really are and where  we are heading to in our  lives. To set boundaries means that we are not directly accepting the feelings and beliefs of others and are in complete synchronization with ourselves , which is very important and a prerequisite to tread the path of inner peace.

So how do we do that? Well, first of all we have to become aware of our thoughts, emotions and values . Once in the  know of what needs to be done to add  add value  to our lives ,  it  helps  to put our faculties and energy in that direction to prevent its dissipation in vain. 

When we become aware of our priorities, we can also figure out emotionally draining  people, places and situations which are  stressful and keep us away  from achieving our goals . Once we achieve this state, we can learn to manage ourselves in these states.

We should learn to let go of what no longer feels right.

Secondly,  we should observe our behavioral pattern. How we respond in those situations, when people  playing a victim card, try to ensnare us in their trap. 

We should not fall in their trap by empathizing with such manipulators. It helps no one. It is a zero sum game.Not falling prey to such narcissistic manipulators ultimately helps both. 

Assertiveness and saying no to what we feel strongly is a desirable trait for having a peace of mind ,sanity and our originality. 

Anything else is simply not worth your time and energy.

 

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VANDANA JAISWAL

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